Ooooh look, another blog entry.

So I was reading blogs as you do and then a thought popped in to my head. Why don't I actually write in my blog every time I sit here reading some? So I'm making an effort and writing again. Keep in mind, I am a rather boring person so the posts will likely be on repeat.

Since last time? I went to my company's annual charity golf day. Me. With a golf club? Yeah I may or may not have been literally rolling on the floor with laughter. Me and sports don't usually mix, and I was rather afraid of the ball staying put and the club going flying and collecting someone on the head. Fears were baseless though. Didn't end up playing. Instead got to enjoy the golf course at a leisurely pace, enjoying the birds and the trees, and attacking people with the camera. Got paid my usual wage for it, plus 2 bottles of decent wine, and also had the charity request the use of one of my shots in a new publication they put out. Paid and published in a day. I like it. :)

Have since finished with said company however, and it's their loss, not mine. I start a new job tomorrow, a contract role in a (hopefully!) nice cushy government job. Thinking about it, it's probably what I've been aiming for for quite some years. It's good hours (I get to leave early on Fridays for now), and it's damn good pay for what I'll be doing. I remember thinking when I first started work, fresh out of high school, that when I hit a certain figure with my pay then I would be doing well and would be happy. Well, I've hit that figure. Recently thought it wouldn't happen but hey. Let's just hope the smile stays put. :D Car should be paid off in a few weeks at most, then a few costs involved with it due at the end of the year. Should also be able to afford all the tech gadgets I'm after too before the end of the year. It feels nice to have enough money to be comfortable with.

Been laid back with a cold/flu thing the last week or so. Started feeling a bit blank last Saturday, then the sore throat hit on the Sunday. A cough started creeping in with headaches and a snuffly nose about Wednesday and then the voice disappeared. Managed to drag myself to the doc on Saturday just been and got some stuff to hopefully help, also hit up the chemist again today for more cough meds (spent three hours awake barking last night) and some nasal decongestant. Need to be awake/healthy for tomorrow. This weekend, just been going through the dvd collection, the odd bit of a book here and there, and icecream, not because I want to eat, but because I know I have to eat something. Mind, it was nice icecream. :)

Anyway. That's me over and out for another blog. Hope everyone is well.

Sleep! Wonderful sleep!

Friday saw me trundle off to work. Also saw me trundle back home less than an hour later. Feeling pukey, dizzy, sore throat, ears blocked, nose blocked, coughing. The whole shebang. Curled up and watched Weeds. Instant fixer-upper, though a bit of a downer when I realised I have no more new episodes to watch. I believe I may have tried to read at some point too. Took a sleeping tablet and passed out at 8:30 or so, didn't wake up until 8 the next morning when the phone woke me up. Call not for me, was slightly grumpy at being woken up and proceeded to doze for another hour or so.

Saturday saw me wander to Bunnings (giant big hardware store of goodness!) despite feeling like complete and utter crap. Found the paint section and proceeded to gather any piece of paper that had a pretty colour on it (read: bright colours). See, I want my own place one day, but am getting impatient with the whole waiting until I have a deposit saved. Getting paint chips reminds me that I need the deposit in order to get my own place in order to paint it with said pretty colours. Went home, sat and crocheted for the afternoon. Blanket is vaguely happening. Had another sleeping tablet after The Bill (British drama-y goodness, oh how I love it!) and didn't wake up for ten and a half hours. Lovely!

Yesterday I felt a bit better (yay! Happy dance!) and went out again (the answer to "Do I ever have a day where I don't go out?" is "Yes, once in a blue moon"). Found fun comfy chairs to play with (seriously, when did office chairs become good enough that you can use them as an arm chair AND a rocking chair?), the camera I want for over $100 less than RRP (will buy after next pay day. Insert happy squealing here!), and horseshoe gramma (makes for delicious pies made by mum).

No sleeping tablets, and thus today I've been awake since 3am. Insomnia is a bitch that I would like to slaughter. Can't have slaughter without laughter...... Ahem. Have had coffee. Much. Very strong. Am awake. Really. But on the bright side, I do feel somewhat better today. While I'm still dizzy, my nose is unblocked enough that I can breathe through it, and my ears seem to be unblocking occasionally, which is awesome for hearing.

My fish appreciated a water change. And I proceeded to dye their water green again. :D Worried about my little black one. Still has the white spot on his side. Not sure if it might be getting bigger too.... New plants are in order I think too. Next pay day.... Running slightly low on money this fortnight. That's what I get for trying to save and spend at the same time.

Disney and pain

Hmmm. So. The weekend. It existed. There we go, that's a start. :)

Saturday came and it was sunny! It's been raining a fair bit recently, or at least threatening to, so I took the opportunity to do what the rhumy suggested and go for a walk. I packed me and the camera into the car and went to a nearby botanic gardens and went trigger happy. It was nice to get out and relax for a few hours, but things started aching a bit.

Got home and got sorted out again and then off I went to go and see the magic that is Disney On Ice - Princess Wishes. Me? Adult? I think not! Was going with a friend, so went to pick her up from work and had a coffee while I waited. Double shot latte. Do you know how long it takes for a double shot latte to start wearing off? At least four or five hours. Be afraid.

Disney was amazing! The skaters were fantastic, the music was obviously Disney awesomeness, the costumes were gorgeous to the point that I wanted to run down there and steal them (particularly the Flounder and Lumiere ones)... My inner child has never loved me so much! Bought a program as a souvenir (it came with a pretend rose), and a stuffed toy of Sebastian (I may love him a little too much, and mostly just because of that accent).

Had dinner afterwards in the form of some very yummy fried rice. This was after my attempt at reverse parking. Not such a good idea when coming down off a coffee high. I think I gave up after about the tenth attempt when I just sat there giggling. Easier to find a different park.

Also felt rather pretty on Saturday night. I put effort in. I wore my pretty top that cost me $70 odd, and I let my hair curl, and I wore mascara. And when I got home and caught myself in the mirror, I actually felt pretty. I should try this more often. I should also have taken a photo so I'd remember it.

Speaking of photos, of nearly 400 taken at Disney, only about 3 came out clear. They were all moving too fast!

Saturday night was met with agony and insomnia. Pain in my back, hips, knees and ankles that woke me up and then the delightful insomnia that kept me awake from 2 till 4:30. My rhumy? He says to me last time, "Go for walks, get good sleep, they'll ease the pain.". Yep. 'Kay. How about some pain killers for the agony those walks give me? How about some sleeping tablets to get rid of the insomnia? Oh, you don't want me turning into a druggie? Well you and the GI don't seem to have much of an issue pumping me to the eyeballs with steroids! Pain relief please now!

Dragged out of bed about 10:30 on Sunday morning, having been awake for ages trying to get back to sleep. In utter agony most of the day. Took me over an hour to make my bed. Seriously need something done and I don't see the rhumy again until the 14th of August. Grumpiness will ensue.

Today, still stiff and sore, though not quite to the extent of yesterday. Just taking things as easy as possible. Also plotting for next weekend. Perhaps skipping the walk because I plan on being on my feet a fair bit cooking. Am thinking lasagna and garlic bread. Well, really I'm thinking garlic bread, and whatever main I happen to think will go best with it at the time. :D I love garlic bread.

Weighty issues....

So I went to work on Friday. And I actually worked a bit extra too. Just some work for a customer that needs doing rather quickly so yeah. Extra time got done. Doesn't worry me, I offered to do it, and it'll make up maybe a little bit of the time I've had off with my hands. Also decided on Friday night that if I was well on Saturday I'd go for a drive (Dad wasn't feeling up to going to Sydney for the symposium).

Saturday I was woken up by a shite of a cramp in my right leg. Bitch! I need that leg for driving! Let it calm down, massaged it a bit, then crawled out of bed to see if I could walk. Walking was doable, so I packed me, the camera, the Imodium, and the two rolls of loo paper into the car and off I went. Stopped for breakfast and was about to go again when I got a phone call from a really good friend. Just to chat, but it was fantastic to hear from him. He has a bad habit of calling once I've already gone to bed, and my phone's usually on silent anyway. Set off again and started enjoying the day even more. That lasted maybe another hour until the cold symptoms kicked in (again!). They just won't go away. Kept going, and took one of my usual drives through the Hunter Valley.

I love that place. I was raised there. It's home. And there's usually a very strong pull at the heart strings to go there and stay there. It was missing yesterday. Something wasn't right. It was still a very pretty drive through the country (what I remember of it, I slipped into auto pilot because of the cold), but it didn't tug the heart strings, and that makes me a little sad. For years, despite not living there anymore, it's been the place I go to to think and to calm down when I'm stressed or angry or upset. And I always feel free and safe and welcome there. But I just wasn't getting that yesterday. It was just another place, with no meaning. I'm not so much sad that the feeling is gone, it's just I've always viewed myself as belonging there because of that feeling. With the feeling gone, I guess I don't really belong there anymore, which is fine, but what bugs me is where do I belong then? If I'm not still the country kid at heart, then who am I? I know I'm a little lost right now, but that's about it. Maybe I need to start creating the person I want to be. I dunno. Random thoughts that probably don't make sense. Eh.

I've thought recently that my stretch marks have been a little bit painful. Stinging, burning, that kinda thing. Last night I discovered that yes indeed they have been painful, and there's a reason. They're actually splitting open. Well, at least one has. Just a small split, but enough to bleed. I've fattened up at a rate where I am actually splitting my skin. Embarassing much? So the crash exercise/eating regime has begun (again. For the gazillionth time.) today. As a result, I got to weight myself on the Wii. When I first bought that, I entered that I wanted to lose 10 kilos. Instead I have managed to gain more than that. I'm now up to 91.5 kilos. A kilo a week gained. And it takes me a month to lose a kilo. I'm a year behind where I wanted to be. Actually, more than that, but hey. Hopefully if I hit things hard I can speed that up a bit. And coming off the Pred is now a big issue. I can't stay on a med that is essentially causing me to split myself at the seams. Glad in a way for that arthritis now.....

Today, woken up by fecking birds. They're the nuisance Minahs, and they insist on tapdancing on the tin roof under my window and squawking as loud as possible. Then they repeat the process on my window sill. Bastards. I needed sleep! Dragged out of bed, wandered around some shops, exercised on the Wii, wandered around some more shops and came home again in pain. The muscle in my leg that cramped yesterday is being a bitch and is all tight and sore. As a result it's making me walk funny, and thus my knees and hips have given out, and my back's following suit. And I can't really do much more in the intended line of exercise now either. :(

Am also tired as all buggery. Despite it only being 2:30 in the arvo, it feels like I should have been asleep for the past few hours. It really feels so much later. *sigh* And I have to drag out of bed for work in the morning. Bah. I just need a few days where I can sleep for as long as I need to, not how long is dictated by the alarm, or my screwed up body, or the damned birds! Never mind. Coffee is a god. :)

And now off to write pretty brightly coloured motivational signs telling me "Don't eat bad foods!" and "Don't give up now!". ........Yes, I seriously am going to do that. Splitting your skin is scary stuff people! It calls for drastic measures! :D

Owwies and Planning

Stocktake of the owwies this morning... Both hands/wrists/fingers. Both elbows. Back. Right hip and knee. Left shoulder and knee. Neck to a certain degree. Also have Crohn's pain (either from Maccas for lunch yesterday or pizza for dinner, I had a bad day) and the coldy/fluey crap that's going on.

Off to see the rhumy tomorrow. Wondering what's going to happen with that. I mean, it's gonna cost me a fortune, and possibly all that's gonna happen is that I'll be told I have arthritis, which he told me last time anyway.

Saturday I'm possibly off to Sydney for the CCA symposium. Will mean an early start, but hopefully dad won't hate me too much if I sleep in the car on the way there and back.

Sunday I'm going to attempt to make it to the local farmers markets. I used to get every fortnight, and then every week when they changed to that, but I haven't had the energy in months now. That needs to change. Planning on doing a stall there one day (it's a craft market too), so will need to be able to drag myself out of bed early enough for that.

Monday is work, then the GI doc. Seriously need off the Pred. Struggling to get out of bed some mornings with the state of mind it puts me in, not to mention all the other delightful side effects I always whinge about. Promise I'll stop whinging about them when I come off the Pred. Promise! :P Hopefully he can get the ball rolling for the Humira too, if the rhumy doesn't do it tomorrow.

And then Tuesday after work (as long as I'm not dead to the world) is the monthly support group thinger. Hoping to go. It's good to know I'm not entirely alone in the world.

So I'm a teeny bit busy for the next week or so. Will probably run myself into the ground and take a few weeks to recover, but hey. That's what I do.

New financial year starts today, so new plans are starting to take shape. Want to do another Tafe course, but not through Tafe. Can't stand the thought of going back there, and besides, I wouldn't be awake enough of an evening, which is my only available time. So I'm looking at paying $1500 instead of $900 and doing a Cert IV in Small Business Management through the distance ed part.

Also hoping to do the market stall, but a lot of planning still needs to be done, and as such it may not happen this year (calendar or financial). We'll see.

Hoping to buy a laptop to be of use with the market stall stuff, but also I want to get back into writing. I used to write a lot, but haven't in recent years. I like the idea of running away with a laptop to a beautiful quiet location and being inspired by that and typing away for however long the computer lasts before the battery dies. Sounds like fun to me.

And my photography. Need to get back into that. I've hardly done any since I did a friend's wedding shots, I just haven't really been motivated to. Need to fix that and get some nice shots again. There's a camera that I'm looking at, it's actually better than my current one spec wise, but the main thing I'm after it for is that it's a compact one, and while my current one is an amazing camera, it's a large clunky one, so it makes it difficult to take it certain places. No point in buying a new camera though if I'm not going to use it.

I'm noticing with this blog that it's becoming more or less my main blog, despite originally starting out as a place for the Crohn's. I was trying to separate the Crohn's from my life, as well as keep my sanity. Neither have happened. :P So I'm not going to bother trying to keep things separate from now on. Random stuff will appear in here, completely unrelated to my bothersome gut, so I guess I'll just tag the Crohn's related stuff with Crohn's and the rest will be the rest. Don't worry, it'll probably still be about the same as it is now, just maybe slightly better tagged?

PS- No kitten. I still really want that kitten.
PPS- Didn't win lotto last night. Bugger.